The very happiest of Eid Greetings to all of you from myself and my family – may Allah accept our righteous deeds, and bring us joy and glad tidings all year, every year. Ameen!
My khutbah to the community this year can be summarised in a few paragraphs (he said!):
The disregard that the Muslim community in the West gives to Eid al-Adha is further undermined by at least two negative factors which effect the Muslim psyche.
Firstly, because this Eid is traditionally seen as the one that 2nd generation Muslims don’t take a holiday for, or don’t make much of a fuss about, the importance of the event as a religious celebration and an exclamation of Allah’s greatness is decreased in our hearts and the hearts and minds of our families, particularly our children.
Naturally, it’s not easy when this particular Eid isn’t preceded by a tiring, difficult month of fasting, when the celebration itself is spread over 3-4 days, when the people (quite incredibly) celebrate the Eid day itself over three different days, when the day itself is freezing cold, dark and dreary etc etc.
Add to this the second negative factor, that of Eid’s proximity to Christmas and you soon realise we’ve got a real problem. When you see the most consumer-focused materialistic society on Earth totally close down over Christmas, people prepare so much for it, spend so much on it and mentally psyche themselves up to celebrate it so much, it really does leave the Muslim community in the West looking at their own Eid and feeling rather sad, particularly for our children. It is little surprise then that our children love and value their birthday, Easter and Christmas parties at school so much, and why they talk about it so much at home with their parents who have no-one else to blame but themselves.
Yet all these factors should surely encourage the Muslim community to wake up and start to make both Eids something really worthwhile, both with respect to the men so as to not let Eid al-Adha become a token Eid prayer in the morning followed by a day at the office and a night out with the lads in the evening, and most importantly their children so that our kids really have something to talk about, be proud of, and wait and dream about in anticipation for weeks in advance.
Also, when you do find yourself spending some rare quality time with your family this Eid, take another look at how the non-Muslims ear-mark Christmas as the big family reunion and remind yourself that even such a single huge effort is unacceptable for a practising Muslim. If Eid is becoming our only time that we remember the family and so on, then be warned that Allah jalla wa ala demands the very highest standard of maintaining family ties, all the time, every time.
Know that our relations with our extended families are at an all time low. As the elders become older, and we become more wealthy, independent, professional and isolated from our traditional ghettos of first generation Islam, the apparent need to keep in touch doesn’t seem important any more. Perhaps this is because we’ve forgotten that Allah has promised the tie of kinship (al-rahim) that He will cut off he who breaks family ties, and will maintain those who maintain family ties. Perhaps we’ve forgotten that the one who doesn’t maintain family ties will not enter Paradise. Perhaps we’ve forgotten that mercy will not descend upon a nation that has within it those who don’t maintain family ties. This is all authentic from the one who we claim to follow unreservedly sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
Perhaps the most shocking development is our disintegrating relationship, adab and manners with our parents. Not only is our frequency of contact decreasing, but our manner of interaction is at an all time low despite this being from the most deadly of the destructive sins and that the the one who continues in ill-manners with ones parents being condemned to the hell-fire. We seem to have forgotten as in the last ten years, with the increasing percentage of Muslim parents entering old people’s and residential homes, the absolute right they hold over us, the fact that we are humiliated by not getting to Paradise by not looking after them ourselves, and indeed the startling fact that Allah jalla wa ala emphasises care of the parents only second to worshipping him (al-Isra, 23). Again, this is all authentic from the one who we claim to follow unreservedly sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
Finally, it’s back to our children. If we don’t give them the same concern we show them on Eid everyday, we’re only going to allow something else to replace that, something which will invariably be more damaging in the long run. Undoubtedly, this will take great effort on our behalf but this is what communal gatherings and celebrations help us to do: remind us of what we need to prioritise and sort it out before it’s too late.
Let’s ensure that our family become our absolute priority in these times, in the very best of manners, and that we then carry on these sentiments that we find in a correctly celebrated Eid or a Christmas or simply in the example of individuals fulfilling their family obligations in a worthy and responsible way.
And that’s that. Summarised in just a few paragraphs. Plus some. Rather like the Khutbah itself. Sorry.
May I also thank those who have been asking about my family, particularly my parents. They are safe alhamdulillah but this is not the case for many good practising Muslims in the Swat area of NWFP, Pakistan. Due to the fitnah and true terrorism of the militants who of course have now fled, the army and secret services have entered all the village and tribal areas and are rounding up any practising Muslims they feel could have been involved, carting them off to secret prisons for to be tortured. This means hundreds of peaceful tablighi jamat and ahle-hadees brothers who haven’t been involved whatsoever, those who might wear a turban, those who have beards and especially those who are attending the prayers regularly have already been carted off wa la hawla wa quwwata illa billah. As you can imagine, the congregations have dropped shockingly and the barbers are in booming business as many shave off their beards to protect their families.
Even worse are those tribal enemies who are now rubbing their secular little hands in glee and are reporting names of innocent people to the secret services as those who were involved in terrorism, so that they are also tortured, all because of some ancient perceived grudge or enmity, or because one looked at the other in the ”wrong way” or even passed wind in his presence. May Allah protect us from this ignorance and transgression against the Believers of Allah.
Please remember those other Muslims around the world in your du’as as we sit and enjoy our Eid with our families in safety, security and luxury. May Allah give this Ummah strength to cope with its burdens and allow them to be a purification for us and enter us into His Garden, ameen.
PS: on an infinitely lighter note, can I just say that I will literally have a psychotic fit if anyone else asks me how Kif is doing in the Emirates. Can I ask: how on Earth do you think he’s doing?!? Let me tell you: he’s doing absolutely fantastically swimmingly fine, that’s what! Has everyone forgotten that it’s me who has to work all week and earn jack squat, wake up in the dark, come back in the dark and be cold at the same time, have to put up with all those lot all week (you know who you are!) etc etc. And then I’ve got to put up with all the rest of life’s bakwas at the same time. I think everyone has forgotten that he’s the one in the sun, working 2 hrs a day 3 days a week or something similarly ridiculous, with the sand, sea and halal Hijrah Hardies at hand. Yeah.
Bitter and Jealous? Me?
December 19, 2007 at 11:30 pm
Abu Eesa, How’s Kif doing?
Always wanted to see you have a have a psychotic fit
December 20, 2007 at 12:10 am
‘Eid Mubaarak to you too…
Wishing you and your family a wonderful ‘Eid!
December 20, 2007 at 12:10 am
Always wanted to see you have a have a psychotic fit
Why you cheeky…
(Yeah, too right you stay anonymous…)
December 20, 2007 at 11:37 am
Salam, excellent article, Jazakallahu khayran.
‘wake up and start to make both Eids something really worthwhile’
But how? My family just gets together for a meal (which covers joining the ties) but we do this weekly anyway?
When I was not practising I used to love Eid, go out to a restaurant, watch a movie, and go bowling, it was good fun. Now that I’m practising, I struggle to think of how to celebrate Eid. Can anybody help me out?
I want my family to replace their celebrations of birthdays, christmas, mothers/fathers day etc with the 2 Eids but this is difficult when our Eids are so empty.
What did the Prophet (s) and the Companions (r) do on Eid?
December 20, 2007 at 12:50 pm
The pious predecessors consumed meat from their qurbani.
my advice is that the brothers physically try and do the qurbani themselves. i’ve heard from my own folks that no one in england accepts the meat afterwards – i.e. that folk are so pretentious that they prefer M&S meat than the meat of Qurbani.
However, i have another suggestion to mitigate this – I was thinking this through myself. How about – for those who are not on Hajj and can afford to do so. Take a trip to a less fortunate part of the Muslim World. Expand your horizons, take your families to a different setting, do some sightseeing and conduct a Qurbani there. This flies in the face a little of Abu Eesa recommendation to make it more like chrimbo. However, many of the christians do go abroad for their christmas too.
Anyway, you will be surprised by how wonderful celebrating eid can be in Northern Cameroon, or in the old cities of Morocco.
I’m out of ideas right now…
December 20, 2007 at 2:53 pm
Salaam and Eid Mubarak to all brothers and sisters. May Allah keep you all strong and continue to bless you all abundantly.
Lets not forget that us breathing abd being able to read the khutba amongst other things is a blessing in itself. Allah has blessed us with the understanding of Islam and has made our hearts Muslim as well as our actions (Insha’Allah).
But think deeper, let’s make our souls Muslim. That if need be Allah puts us in a situation where we have to decide Islam or worldly comforts – we will gladly choose Islam and go through the torture with smiles on our faces knowing we are doing thing’s Feesabilillah. That throughout all out trials and tribulations we are still kind, generous and keeping our emaan firm. Let’s remember the Sahaabiyat who lost their lives for Allah but still conducted themselves as they were taught and shown by our Prophet Muhamed SAW.
Detach yourself from the material but remember to be moderate. Beautify your inner self so that it shows in the outer, soften you hearts by listening to the Quran….and do what i did if your on Facebook – come off! It’s a distraction to mankind!
Wonderful Khutba Abu Eesa. May Allah reward you Ameen
Wa’Alaikum Salam
Allah will never leave us, so why should we leave Him????
December 20, 2007 at 3:14 pm
Back in the days whilst at Uni, some of the brothers used to hold a family day. People would go with their families and there would be activities for the kids and for adults such as competitions, sports, eating, recitation and nasheeds.
It’s not beyond us for some families to get together hire a hall, get some activities going for different ages. Put in a reminder, collect some money etc.
Wassalam
December 20, 2007 at 3:15 pm
actually, it is beyond most muslims to do that and then sit there and complain
December 20, 2007 at 3:34 pm
Hardies is ok, but out here we prefer KFC, Pizza Hut, Mcdonalds, Burger King etc.
You don’t realise how tiring it can get for us to have to travel between takeaways, pray anywhere we like, Shop for pittence etc.
Wake up Abu E, you’ve got it far better in Blighty.
And if you believe that…….
December 20, 2007 at 4:28 pm
[...] Eid Khutbah by Abu Eesa [...]
December 20, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Assalamulaikum
That was a nice post about ties of kinship, which I 100% agree with. I just have a question. If my wife is unwell and I have to take care of her because say its a long time illness, and this affects my visiting my parents say to once a week, whereas it use to be twice a week. What should I do? My parents haven’t been to understanding, as me and my wife don’t want to discuss what the problem is.
My parents probably think that “I have forgotten them” and is affecting my relationship with them as they think that theres nothing wrong. Any advice would be much appreciated.
December 20, 2007 at 6:13 pm
Assalamu ‘alaykum all
Let me first say that I always have a great Eid masha’Allah, despite the fact that I am always ill on that day, have to give the khutbah on that day (which I hate to do) and my family don’t even live in this country. But to answer the question above quickly:
What did the Prophet (s) and the Companions (r) do on Eid?
We don’t necessarily have specific details of their Eid day but we have some general facts that lead us to the conclusion that their day was about unity, community, eating and drinking together and recreation together.
Remember, there was only one prayer because it was outside so everyone was able to meet up and congratulate and celebrate together. Then they’d all go and sacrifice their animals straight away. Then we know they’d eat from their meat, pray in congregation, take their naps, and fulfill many invitations of their families and Companions. Also, for recreation, there would be racing, and other forms of verbal competition for past-time. May Allah be pleased with them all.
With respect to how we can actually make Eid al-Adha better for us here in the West, I think there are a few key factors to concentrate on:
- Getting a single day agreed upon.
Naturally there is a discussion amongst scholars on whether there is any connection between the Eid and Hajj; I thought that we’d have the best chance of a single day with this Eid due to the very strong connections between the manasik of Hajj and the udhiyah, eating, drinking and celebration of Eid – alas, it’s not to be, especially when you’ve got people doing Eid on Friday. Now listen, when you’ve got people doing Eid on the same day as Pakistan, then you know that something’s wrong there…
- One Eid prayer
Instead of many congregations and giving the “punters” too much choice, it’s time to start to really push for the Sunnah of an external single congregation with all the men and women in attendance. There are already some good efforts towards this in London for example, and it is those communities that usually have a good programme of events for the community for the rest of the day too masha’Allah.
In Cheadle, I hope to establish this wonderful Sunnah within the next 2-3 years insha’Allah. We have the space but the weather is not on our side and we really need to plan for a permanent structure that we can store as opposed to renting in the thousands of pounds.
A single meeting place for everyone will do wonders for the mood of the Muslim community, especially when you see people for the first time in ages. Remember, it’s people power that makes a fantastic Halal Eid, not relegating it to Hollywood and all that artifical bakwas.
- Sacrificing our own animals
This is obviously a problem for us here in the UK. A lot of people believe that it is better to send our sacrifices abroad for the poor; the reality is that although a lot of benefit is achieved this way, certainly the Sunnah of a local sacrifice and then the eating from that meat and the sharing of that meat with ones local neighbours and family should be revived. This particular ‘illah is a beautiful part of the success of Eid, everyone getting physically involved in their sacrifice, feeling the moment in a real sense, and then creating such happiness when sharing it with others, not least the wonderful fresh meat that you get to eat from.
I received hundreds of congratulatory phone calls yesterday my dear brothers and sisters, but I can tell you that none of them were as exciting and welcome as the one that I received from Q with a bag of fresh lamb leg waiting outside the door masha’Allah – my goodness, how yummy that was! Well done bro, jazakallahu khayran!
There are plenty of other ideas that we can implement but they are slightly subjective and people we have different tastes. For example, people like big events for the family which is vital for the kids but probably make sense to be organised for a later weekend date or something due to all the logistical issues etc.
I like to spend my Eid visiting the family I have here because it is an easy way of collecting reward for little effort – those who keep in regular contact with their family as mentioned above shouldn’t let up on this day either. Rather, try and make it extra special but doing good regularly doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do that good action at even more emphasised times.
- Communal Get-Togethers
The men and women should organise their own gatherings for one of the Eid days; at the major level, it should be the wider circle of brothers (and sisters for their own) and the smaller level in the meantime, we have to concentrate on those people who don’t have families etc such as the many students, immigrants, asylum seekers, foreign workers etc that we have in our communities. When I used to be in Longsight, we used to share that duty between us for our local “foreigners” but now, it’s basically Q’s job to deal with it every year.
Masha’Allah, it’s always a great event. Yesterday was no different with fabulous food and even more fabulous entertainment. With the elders present and cricket on the cards, there’s always something to shout and argue about, eat, shout and scream a bit more, eat, shout a bit more, eat, then kiss and make up and pray Dhuhr. Ay na’m.
I feel guilty saying that we all had a great Eid but then our circle always goes to great efforts to make it so and therefore I can only say we deserve it. The key thing now is to make the rest of the community feel the same way insha’Allah.
Oh, and can I end with saying that if I get one more text message from someone who doesn’t mention their name…
December 20, 2007 at 8:49 pm
@Al
Why didn’t you also tell him that we prayed outdoors in the thousands, personally selected and slaughtered sheep, followed by some families having outdoor BBQs with quadding later for young and old? (Masha’allah)
Doesn’t the grass always seem greener on the other side? Now who was it that used to teach us that I wonder?
December 21, 2007 at 1:17 am
Yep, Eid Al-adha was like that to me until a group of brothers took me to Udhiyah/Qurban… Since then, this Eid is a really busy one: selecting the animal, distributing the meat, Annnnnnnnnnnnnd (last but not least) EATING!!!
Here is my thought about this Eid
http://livinghalal.blogspot.com/2007/12/whats-your-gift-for-allah-on-eid-aladha.html#links
December 21, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Grass?? In UAE??
December 22, 2007 at 6:11 am
Geezer they have ice here, forget grass.
This is the UAE.
December 23, 2007 at 1:37 am
Br. Kifayatullah,
What sort of job opportunities are open to UK graduates in the UAE? Are they in need of people qualified in TEFL (as that’s what a lot of people moving abroad opt for) or are there vacancies for Optometry/Pharmacy graduates?
December 23, 2007 at 8:18 am
Those involved in education generally pick up jobs the easiest.
However the Middle East and especially the UAE are increasingly asking for a lot more than just a TEFL. To get a good position you should have a reasonable amount of experience, maybe even a masters too.
If that is the case for the Education sector, then imagine what its like when speaking good English isnt the main skill advantage. i.e. Jobs in IT, Accountancy, and Medicine.
Some of the best routes into the UAE are:
- Jobs advertised in Western Media
- A UK company that has a branch in the region
- Jobs advertised in Arab papers i.e. Gulf News, Khaleej times
I get the impression that the days of blagging a job because you can speak good English are quickly diminishing. There are a lot of Indians, Egyptians, Filipinos, and other nationalities around that can offer that plus a lot more, for the same price.
December 24, 2007 at 12:26 am
Are these posts still open to people who have around a year of teaching experiance without a pgce {although have a degree}??
what are the chances?
jzk
wasalam
December 24, 2007 at 12:48 am
Umm Red,
i’ve been teaching for 5 years now, with a pgce.
I haven’t worked in the UAE, but the best qualified and experienced will get the job. The competition rules are comparable to what they are over here.
I have looked for jobs in Arabia and found that most employers would like a ‘Formal’ qualification in the area of work, hence ideally teacher should be formally schooled for teaching + teaching experience.
The markets over their are saturated with foreign nationals. best to get CertEd or PGCE to be competitive.
Nonetheless, I think it’s worth applying anyways; there are teaching supply agencies within the UK that will help you find a job abroad.
December 24, 2007 at 10:05 pm
thankyou anon.
I may just do a pgce in sept 2008 if it means i can live in a hot country with excellent benefits!
December 24, 2007 at 11:31 pm
Good Umm Red,
If you intend on going down this route, give it 110%; don’t do it just to test the waters.
Develop a strong intention to work abroad and work hard to achieve it; otherwise, unfortunately you will be wasting time, money and effort.
Also, do a pgce in Secondary or Primary education. They need Key Stage or GCSE teachers. Do NOT do a pgce for Further and Higher Education otherwise you’ll be stuck for a job in the UK and Abroad. Colleges and Uni’s are the voluntary sector, not statutory; hence too many candidates per vacant post.
Whereas, Secondary and Primary education are statutory; they offer good pay and pension schemes and they are in demand in the UK, most other countries, including Arabia.
Good luck, and make dua’s with the right intentions. May Allah make it easy for you.
December 25, 2007 at 1:01 am
thankyou once again mr/ms anon!May Allah reward you with good ameen.
I would mostly likely do a pgce in primary education…kids are so much more fun.
December 27, 2007 at 8:56 pm
Asalam alaikum wa Rahmatullah,
Eid Mubarak to you and your family, may Allah Ta’ala bless you with the best khair in this life and the hereafter ~ also, Jazak Allah khair for your blog, I always enjoy reading it and have benefited from it a lot.
January 2, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Good reminder..
[a late] eid mubarak.
Keep up the good work.