I think everyone is fascinated by the American Presidential Race, but clearly the introduction of Sarah Palin truly jazzed up an already interesting situation.

But I have a problem: after my study of what Palin has to offer, I think I can sum up the key characteristics that she’s counting on:

1. She’s a girl. There’s clearly some kind of novelty factor there.

2. She’s a pretty girl (hey don’t be shy, admit it, just don’t look twice that’s all). No doubt Palin will look far better than Biden on the special design White House Xmas card.

3. She’s a family woman – sorry, I mean she’s a “hockey mom” (said in your most irritating Yank accent)

4. She’s got a record of giving people money back in her governing of the State of Alaska.

5. She’s got foreign policy experience because she can see the Russian tundra from her attic window.

6. She can seduce 3rd-rate foreign leaders when they come round for tea. Come on Zardari saab, it’s all over Youtube for crying out loud.

 

With that in mind, I wish to urge my fellow American brothers and sisters that Angelina Jolie will make a far more effective Vice President, at the very least because:

1. She’s definitely a girl.

2. She’s an oh-so pretty girl at that too, I’m told on reliable authority.

3. She’s most certainly a family woman. How many kids exactly?

4. She’s given more or her own money away in charity than Palin gave back to her people from their own money.

5. She’s got plenty of foreign policy experience. She actually lived in Pakistan for a while for crying out loud – surely she deserves a medal and the Presidency just for that alone! Oh, she also has the entire United Nations amongst her kids. Beat that Palin.

6. Well, she’s married to the world’s most desired bloke and she also has a track-record with 3rd-rate leaders. Ask Shaukat Aziz…

Gosh, this blogging bakwas is fun sometimes!