I was approached recently by a young student of knowledge from al-Madinat’l-Munawwarah who will soon start teaching in the West and he asked me a few questions about the da‘wah and other things.
He was very polite and respectful which is something that stood out for me, and which helped his cause too because in particular he wanted to know how I felt about being criticised publicly for some of the decisions I have made in the da‘wah, as well as more obvious mistakes that both he and others were aware of in my work.
I told him many things and gave my take on the issue. I also ended by telling him (and I thought it would be beneficial if I shared this with you all) that if I were scared of criticism, I wouldn’t be involved in teaching or giving da‘wah or being an activist. If you remain sitting down no-one will care, but it’s when you make a stand do people then want to take a pot-shot at an easy target, which I guess – and excuse the pun – is fair game I suppose?
One of my favourite quotes that keeps me going in the da‘wah is that by Shedd when he said:
“A ship in harbour is safe – but that is not what ships are for.”
Sometimes you need to be hard-skinned at the personal nature of ad-hoc attacks and other times you need to express quite a level of compassion when you see occasionally the utter level of ignorance of some who just wish to make their point.
Making our point is something that we Muslims do a lot, but don’t do very well. Add to this the cold, impersonal nature of e-communication where good intentions are often lost quicker than it takes to say “innamal a‘malu bin-niyyat” and you have a real recipe for fitnah and disaster.
To cite a relevant example, you need to look no further than the current fitnah between Shaykh ‘Adil al-Kalbani who recently enjoined a stint as the Imam of the Ka’bah and who wrote an article concerning amongst other things singing etc (always going to attract attention!), which raised the ire of a certain illustrious Imam by the name of Shaykh Shuraim – yes, his recent colleague and the permanent superstar Imam of Masjid’l-Haram – who no doubt must have had good intentions in his wanting to advise Shaykh al-Kalbani, but by choosing the internet as the medium of advice, and choosing to write a poem against al-Kalbani, really only made the situation ten times worse and we unfortunately have a real spat on our hands.
But what I really wanted to say is this: it is wholly wrong to believe that just because the advice or peoples’ base desires are expressed with a complete dearth of manners, this should not then lead you to throw the baby out with the bathwater tempting though it is!
Personally speaking, I eventually tend to read most if not all the feedback, comments and criticism that I may elicit during my day-to-day activities, despite the bitterness or painful nature sometimes of exposing yourself to the worst of human qualities such as hate, jealousy, envy or just plain simple innocent ignorance. Sometimes you wonder if more people remembered the saying “When looking for faults, use a mirror not a telescope” perhaps we’d have a much healthier social framework between us all to advise and help one another.
In any case I’d like to think that I also act upon a lot of that advice even though that might not seem apparent at the onset. In fact, if I didn’t have this attitude I’d get myself into real trouble considering my propensity for releasing masses of written material and to a lesser extent AV material, and my unfortunate ability to drop a real clanger here and there – something which is especially painful for someone who makes himself out to be a real perfectionist but hey I guess I prove better than most that no-one is perfect!
Indeed as our ‘Ulema tell us, if you are going to wait for a perfect teacher then you’ll never get to learn anything.
And here in perhaps a bizarre twist to this little piece, I thought it would be useful to review a few of some of my own personal mistakes/bloopers that I’ve committed (and please feel free to use the comments section to add your own cos’ you won’t get such an opportunity again I tell ya!) for perhaps three reasons:
- Because there are many people out there that might be misled in their worship by my mistake and thus it needs publicizing and correcting
- It proves that I do read feedback and that I certainly take criticism and corrections on board. It’d just be nice for it to be always a bit more objective and have less of the great heart-opening-reading-my-intention trick.
- The most important: it proves for a cracking laugh for you lot, something which I’m always prepared to do my baisti for if it turns out for the common good. And with an ego as humongous as mine, it can’t be bad for my nafs either…
So here is a random list of bloopers that come to mind that other folks have spotted one way or the other and then let me have it over that mistake, or in some cases just let me know with a gentle nudge, wink and a smile…
The Best of Dates
I start with this one because it was certainly bought to my attention in the most nicest and gentlest of manners, albeit costing me a right packet!
A while ago I prepared an article called “The Best of the Best” in which I listed 100 different things which the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) mentioned to be “the best”. In this list, I mentioned a hadith in which he (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said, “The best of your dates is the Borniyyu date”.
Being rather lazy at the time, I just assumed the authenticity of said hadith because of its authentication by a single contemporary hadith scholar. And believing in this fact, I recently purchased an entire bucket of these rather nice dates and gifted them to my own teacher, Shaykh Kehlan.
“What are these then?” he asked me.
“Aha! Only like the BEST DATES YOU CAN GET Shaykh! Don’t you know the hadith about Borniyyu dates? “The best” as said by Rasulullah!” I replied with sheer smugness.
“Oh right. Ok. But I’m sorry to tell you this hadith is actually weak and not established,” he replied smiling.
“Oh.”
“Anyway, leave them – I’ll have them with my tea…” (Scant consolation from the Shaykh for my shattered ego believe me!)
The Riwayah That Never Was
This I think falls into the category of “sheer stupidity”. I was told recently that during my recital of a certain du‘a in a few TV recordings, I had been pronouncing it incorrectly sometimes i.e. with a kasrah instead of a dhamma.
Now me being the arrogant so n’ so that I am, refused to believe that I could make such a mistake especially as I had seen some of said TV programmes and I had clearly heard myself pronounce the du‘a correctly, namely:
اللهم لا سهل إلا ما جعلته سهلاً وأنت تجعل الحزن إذا شئت سهلاً
But the brother who was telling me this was not some ordinary Joe but a student of knowledge so he couldn’t be mishearing either. Perhaps – I told myself – I had recited it like that because of it being narrated in both ways (with a kasra and a dhamma) because “I couldn’t possibly be wrong!” you know what I’m saying?
So instead of saying I’ll go back and check and see if that’s really the case, I told the brother, “Oh there’s another riwayah of that du‘a, and if you email me I’ll send it to you, because I can’t make such a mistake like that!”
Anyway, he never emailed, probably because he found out that there wasn’t another riwayah and that I was quite possibly clinically insane and I guess he just thought, “I better leave this miskeen to himself!”
Needless to say when I went back to review the tapes, I found myself on some occasions (for some bizarre reason) reciting the du‘a with a kasrah just like he said. Ajeeb! And of course, no narrations to back me up.
Now that’s what you call baisti folks.
Mountains are all the same aren’t they?
In “The Last Testament”, despite consulting with my own Shaykh on the script I wrote etc, I stated in front of a live audience and what has now been recorded and been bought by thousands of people (ouch!) that the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) would ascend “Jabal Thawr” on his way to meditate in “Ghar Hira’.”
But on a recent trip to the Cave of Hira’ itself, I realized to my absolute horror that I had the complete wrong mountain and that it was actually Jabal Noor that the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) would ascend!
Embarrassing? Yes.
Lesson learnt? Yes. We should motivate the Saudi government to preserve more of such historical sites and not the opposite, if only to save the baisti of some of us next time.
The Two Ikrimahs
This is one of my “favourites” if there even can be such a thing as a favourite mistake. In one of the episodes of al-Adab al-Mufrad Season 1, as in my normal way when we come to a hadith that has big players in the sanad, I usually give a brief biography of said person. The hadith was one of the narrations of ‘Abdullah b. ‘Abbas (radhy-Allahu ‘anhuma) and it was narrated from him by ‘Ikrimah.
Now as soon as I saw his name, I went straight into automatic mode and started telling the live audience (again!) how amazing ‘Ikrimah b. Abi Jahl was, how noble, how brave, what a partnership he had with Khalid b. al-Waleed, how much he loved the Qur’an and so on. I got all carried away as I do and we soon ran out of time and we came to the end and the recording was stopped.
It was now Q & A time (which is off-camera) and I received first of all a little note written in Arabic which said, “Um…brother, are you sure you didn’t mean ‘Ikrimah the student of Ibn ‘Abbas?”
My blood went cold. I was literally dumbstruck. I could not believe that I had just spent the last 10 minutes raving on about completely the wrong person!! How could I have just assumed for one second that the Sahabi ‘Ikrimah b. Abi Jahl was narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas when the only ‘Ikrimah that has done that is the freed slave ‘Ikrimah Mawla Ibn ‘Abbas?!
Anyway, again as you’ll see on the DVD, at the beginning of the very next episode I had to clarify my big blooper which caused a few chuckles in the crowd, proved a real embarrassing moment for myself and then taught me the golden rule: never assume, because it only makes an ass out of u and me.
Folks believe me, I have plenty more bloopers and mistakes out there, and I even compiled a number of them at the end of the al-Adab al-Mufrad DVD Boxset as outtakes just for your entertainment.
I don’t want this little bit of fun at the end take away from the serious nature of this issue: the da‘wah doesn’t stop because we (and myself especially) are prone to mistakes, however big. Likewise, I should take on board all advice and criticism whether I like it or not, and finally, if you do want your advice and criticism to actually benefit the person in question and benefit the rest of the people, then study the adab of behaving correctly and how to present the situation in the best way as taught to us by our early Imams.
Wallahu a‘lam.
July 17, 2010 at 12:27 am
Alhamdulillah, that was a hilarious read
but don’t stop there
I think we deserve ” TOP 100 of AE’s BEST BLOOPERS”
(the jabl thawr/noor was the funniest though-nothing like a ziyarah to put things into perspective).
July 17, 2010 at 2:29 pm
Go for it! I’ll add some more as I think of some…
July 17, 2010 at 4:20 am
Assalamualaikum wa jazakallah khayr Ustadh.
I remember the Ikrimah blooper like it was yesterday and we were actually sitting upstairs and our ‘Saabirah’ turned to me confused and asked, ‘A sahabi narrating from a sahabi? (!)’
I very much admired the way you dealt with it and told us the following lesson, ‘Well you got two for the price of one.’ (Biographies)
I remember thinking ‘wow, if I made a blooper like that I’d want to do a ‘Joey’ from Friends and just ‘Leg it’ out of there.
Sometimes you feel like you are walking on egg shells especially when you know there are certain ‘Connie the cows’ (as Sheikh Muhammad calls them) around just literally waiting for you to slip up. And then even go as far as to somehow bring family into it – like, oh well no wonder…
I’m currently reading Stephen Covey’s 7 habits of highly successful people and habit 4 is :
think win-win®
Covey calls this the habit of interpersonal leadership, necessary because achievements are largely dependent on co-operative efforts with others. He says that win-win is based on the assumption that there is plenty for everyone, and that success follows a co-operative approach more naturally than the confrontation of win-or-lose.
I personally think there would be more chance of success in the da’wa if we tried to have win win relationships with each other rather than win – lose.
Wallaahu a’lam
July 17, 2010 at 2:32 pm
Wa ‘alaykum salam Umm Maymoonah – hope all the family is well and salams to J.
Yeah trust me to come up with some smart Alec comment to cover my baisti!
By the way (and I’m sure you know already), there are actually quite a few hadith with a Sahabi narrating from a Sahabi and even three Sahabi in the chain. This case though was just a complete blonde moment – with of course no offence to all my blonde sisters out there.
July 17, 2010 at 6:30 pm
Actually Ustadh – the adab classes for me was the starting point to study hadith as I’m sure it was for many of us – before that I was clueless and yes it would’ve sounded strange to hear a chain and to actually be be familiar with any narrator beyond the first! It’s only recently that I’ve come across 3 sahabi in a chain (About the Dabb).
Once again I would ask you to re-consider starting the Adab classes or even recording season 2 privately and making them available to purchase. I’m sure most parents and carers will really benefit from studying the ahadith on children.
July 18, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Never say never…
July 19, 2010 at 8:06 am
*Highly Effective that should read.
July 17, 2010 at 1:33 pm
And while were on the subject, us sisters could have used a bit of positive praise once in a while..even though you love teasing us
July 17, 2010 at 2:37 pm
Well, whilst we ARE on the topic, then think of it like this: I’m like a 12 year old unable to deal with his crush on the girl in his class, so he spends all his time picking on her, pinching her, irritating her etc because that’s the only way he can express that he fancies her. Trust me, all the boys know what I’m talking.
So, me still being like a little kid, then imagine I have the same problem: I am so completely in awe at how amazing the sisters are (and especially the good practising sisters who are open easy target in these difficult times) and considering how completely pathetic the majority of men are these days, the only option I have is to be negative towards and attack all the women out there. So just a bit of reverse psychology, you know, being emotionally insecure like I am and all that…
July 17, 2010 at 2:41 pm
lol, interesting. I like it, i’ll let you off now.:-)
July 17, 2010 at 2:40 pm
As-salaamu ‘alaykum Ustadh Abu Eesa
Hilarious post! Sometimes, it takes guts for one to admit one’s mistakes so I applaud you for that.
Btw I left a comment in your previous post that I’d rather like a reply to cos it’s confusing me. Could you check it out please?
July 17, 2010 at 6:03 pm
BarakAllah fiikum.
Speaking of al adab al mufrad … we are waiting for Season 2 ya Shaykh, has it been recorded?
We benefited greatly, jazakAllah khier.
July 17, 2010 at 11:50 pm
Asalaamualaykumwarahmatallah,
I would really wish that Adab al Mufrad season 1 would be available again online.
Will it ever restock?
Jazakallahukhayr
July 18, 2010 at 5:02 pm
Wa ‘alaykum salam wa rahmatullah
Try Amsons or al-Hidaayah online. I’m sure some shops will still have it, right?
July 18, 2010 at 12:32 am
mashaALlah one of the best (and funniest) posts i’ve read in a while here!
July 18, 2010 at 12:41 am
One of our teachers taught us that when shaytan “runs out” of ways to trap Allah’s slaves, he uses other people to discredit and besmirch the Muslim’s reputation and shake his steadfastness. Also, perhaps it is a blessing from Allah, namely that through other people’s backbiting and hassle etc, you are getting good deeds that you otherwise may not have been able to accumulate.
July 18, 2010 at 12:46 am
Aww Sheikh – MashAllah you’re a real eye opener – We’re blessed to have you in our lives. There’s always something good to learn from you – even in your mistakes
July 18, 2010 at 7:18 am
Please see this article:
http://www.saudilife.net/component/content/article/84-personalities/242-the-judgment-of-others-a-mirror-of-your-heartc.html
It’s an excellent reminder for these struggles that we all go through…
July 18, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Indeed an excellent piece!
July 18, 2010 at 8:52 am
Assalamualaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh Sheikh,
Subhanallah, through some light hearted hilarious incidences, you gave the Ummah, especially the Da’aes (which in theory should be the entire Ummah) a very serious message on how to take criticizm and move on! Your words were of real encouragement for me Sheikh! Jazakallahu Khairan.
BTW, the most hilarious of all the bloopers, in my opinion, was the story of Ikrimah! Looking forward for more words of intense, yet light hearted words of wisdom Sheikh.
July 18, 2010 at 12:59 pm
Riwaayah blooper: Shaykh, I noticed this every time I heard it (esp. on Adab al-Mufrad), but I assumed I had been saying it wrong, or that it really did have its own riwaayah. I had a similar reaction to the Jabal Thawr thing, completely forgetting that Jabal an-Noor even existed.
I wonder if the danger of scholarly mistakes isn’t that the rest of us think we’re wrong – because I would pretty much always assume you were right and I was wrong, and quietly go off and correct my mistake instead of putting my hand up to check (because a Shaykh is above quibbling about kasrahs, obv).
How can the layperson know the difference between when it’s dumb, and when it’s constructive?
July 18, 2010 at 5:00 pm
Easy. Just remember that there is never such a thing as a dumb question, never. This is an attitude that Muslims need to program into themselves at all times. Yeah ok, there are irritating questions, there are irritating people, there are inappropriate questions, there are right and wrong times to ask questions, but there is no such thing as a dumb question from a person who genuinely wants to know the truth because they don’t know, are confused, or just have doubts.
As the Salaf used to say, “the one who never asks questions will forever remain ignorant.” Just think if you had asked this question a while ago and I had seen it and looked back and then realised my mistake earlier because I’m forced to look again – I could have saved 3-4 years of that mistake going around un-noticed! I don’t usually watch or listen to my stuff unless I am super bored or come across it by accident (unless I’m checking something and even then I turn off when I start talking!) so unless someone “challenges” me then we’ll all remain ignorant.
All of us make mistakes, even the super scholars, so what then of the average guys like myself in the West? Remember my motto sister completely nicked from Mulder: Trust No-One.
July 18, 2010 at 6:28 pm
Asalamu alaikum warahmatullah
Ustadh why are none of the scholars, talib ilm, da’ees and imams (from the UK) not guiding the community on how to deal with the impeding ban on the niqaab?
Why are th people of knowledge silent?
The people of i’lm need to stand up to show direction and guidance to the community.
They are not giving us our Haq!
They have responsibilities towards us and they are not fulifiling it.
Ustadh if you could please share your thoughts with us.
Barakallahu feek
July 19, 2010 at 7:11 am
Wa ‘alaykum salam wa rahmatullah
Are you kidding? I think you need to google a bit more…
I wrote on the Jack Straw comments back whenever it was, Sh Haitham has more stuff on the Niqab than I though possible, and in fact I think that there’s TOO much on the niqab, which isn’t helping the issue. We are in danger of doing exactly what we’re being accused of which is turning the niqab into a political object/concept (albeit there is actually a political aspect to the niqab in a round-about way).
I think we should chill our beans with respect to the niqab and just let the sisters get on with wearing it and being normal – and vitally, continue to play a useful and constructive role in society, and not to lock themselves away and make the mistakes that many niqabi sisters make when it comes to interaction with non-related males in society. Yes, just like many sisters haven’t got a daly about the proper concept of hijab, likewise many niqab wearers don’t realise the realities of what goes with wearing such a garment and its trappings.
I don’t discuss this publicly because it quickly turns into a rant and if I can’t control myself then I should at least minimise the harm, and thus I only talk about this issue with my students in closed settings.
Wallahu a’lam.
July 20, 2010 at 2:03 pm
I really think more sisters should wear niqab just to protest against the media’s uproar. Whether you believe it is wajib or not, shouldn’t non-niqab wearing Muslim sisters show their support of their niqabi sisters instead of leaving them in the sidelines to defend themselves? This is something that is part of our Muslim heritage, regardless of the opinion you follow with regards to niqab and the media is attacking an aspect of our deen. As usual, we find most Muslims who are the voices in the media being apologetic and polarising the Muslim community.
July 20, 2010 at 5:19 pm
I agree. Yes it’s rare to see a niqab these days.
And non niqab wearers who aren’t defending it – it will be the hijab next. This is just the begining
July 22, 2010 at 11:36 am
salaam ustadh please enlighten us with the things that niqabi’s do wrong because how can someone correct themself when they don’t even know what their doing wrong in the first place? I have recently started wearing niqab and it would be a great help if you could mention a few words on how to interact with non mahrem men. Not everyone lives close enough to benefit from your sittings.
P.S. besides i heard your currently residing in saudi?
July 18, 2010 at 7:47 pm
As-salaamu ‘alaykum,
Thanks for responding to my comment in the other post. Barakallahu feekum.
As for the link I mentioned about scholarly consensus, please do read it if you can as soon as possible because the points made within it talk about some pretty fundamental matters and it looks quite convincing. If taken seriously, I think it could have some serious ramifications. I’ll mention the link again:
http://www.lamppostproductions.com/files/articles/Scholarly Consensus.pdf
July 19, 2010 at 6:48 am
As salam mu alaikum,
Just passing by and I saw the post.
MashAllah, it takes a certain level of courage to admit one’s mistakes on the internet and as you rightly said, we all make mistakes and that is part of being human. As you know, even Prophet’s made mistakes – rarely.
I hope that our brothers and sisters are pointing theses mistakes out in the right spirit.
Sayyidina Umar(RA) used to say what translates to:
May the Mercy of Allah be on the one who gifts me my faults.
Akhi Abu Easa I had a question for you?
Should it be Madinat’l-Munawwarah or al-Madinat’l Munawwarah?
July 19, 2010 at 7:12 am
Wa ‘alaykum salam
It should be al-Madinat’l-Munawwarah of course! Why do you ask?
July 25, 2010 at 7:56 am
I asked because whoever types your blog initially typed Madinat’l-Munawwarah as can be seen in Google’s cached version of this page.
Is it true that you are living in Saudi? As you know, I am in Kuwait and maybe we can bring you over for a conference etc.
July 19, 2010 at 10:05 pm
Leaving aside deen-related bloopers…My most favourite blooper BY FAR was your support of Simon Hughes for leadership of the LibDems & my absolute bestest bit was the last line of your blog @ the time- (which still makes me LaughOutLoud!)
‘No blasted wonder he was so nice – gays always are aren’t they?’
Classic AE- Love it!!
July 20, 2010 at 5:05 pm
Gosh, that was from like 4 years ago right? Hahaha! You’ve got a right memory you…
July 20, 2010 at 2:30 am
funny piece yet shows no matter how much we know,we are bound to make mistakes and its good for the nafs to gladly admit them.
i used to wake up early sunday morning back in nigeria to catch al adab al mufrad on islma channel.i always marvelled at your detailed explanation&your knowledge that i cant even decribe you to my sister(thats due to my poor english though).i keep telling her about this young imam who explains every line of an hadith.
may Allah increase the good in you dear shaykh.
July 20, 2010 at 2:47 pm
that was hilarious! Not sure when you’re coming back to Al Maghrib in London this year Sheikh but see you then…oh yeah, and if you’re climbing Jabal Noor in last 10 days of Ramadan by any chance I’ll see you there…
on a lighter note, one Pathans left Pak test squad so I hope they bring Younus to fulfill the Pathan quota!
And finally, I see the Sheikh’s got game! Cant disagree with your assessment of a guy teasing a girl he likes:)
July 20, 2010 at 5:07 pm
Salams there Hasham Khan saab
Damn PCB need to eat humble pie and beg Hazrat Yousuf Saab to come back, forget the Pathan quota bakwas! Although it’d be nice to have Younis back too…
Back in London perhaps mid-late 2011 insha’Allah but you never know…
July 20, 2010 at 3:05 pm
Criticism is always good when it’s for the right reasons but often the problem we Muslims face has almost always been the worst case scenario, where we take more than our right when it comes to brothers and criticism which often takes to backbiting and we’ll simply justify ourselves from an impossible position of claiming to know what even the scholars are at pains to understand. Mount thawr or jabal al noor is forgivable There is not one created or impervious to the effects of sin or mistakes how much more so the ignorant we are the mankind. Satan however is much more cleverer so we are easy targets always falling victims to his assaults we will make mistakes as long we are alive for whatever reason we will fall into error’ make no mistake, hence Allah has revealed in his book “Our lord punish us not if we forget or fall into error……” the problems of those high profile people in the dawah is the same as the rest of us if you’re looking for mistakes you’ll find to many. we pray instead for our brothers or sisters instead of digging a pit for him or her perhaps your prays will aid him more’ perhaps the acrimonious feelings that so infects so many people who suffer the evil effects of the tongue these days will dissipate to be replaced by helping each other in birr and taqwah.
Our old people use to say “A man who can’t make any mistakes can’t do anything”
July 20, 2010 at 5:08 pm
Indeed. A man who can’t make mistakes isn’t even a man! Have you thought about that?
Thanks for that Idriss.
July 23, 2010 at 12:27 pm
Thank you for sharing this post!
July 28, 2010 at 7:36 am
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